I Have My Little Pleasures

( Private To Asgard / Hackable By Experts )

( Private Notes / Hackable By Experts )

( Private to Asgard, Una, Unhackable )

{PRIVATE TO ASGARD, UNA, UNHACKABLE}

I apologize for the sudden shift in my behavior, but I request to be left alone for the next several days. I shall be spending most of my time in the greenhouse, if there is to be an emergency. Otherwise, I expect everyone to respect my plea of privacy.

Ryuzaki, I...I am sorry. Truly, deeply sorry. I do desire to meet with you, but I need some time to myself. There are so many things on my mind right now.



{AN: She's gone to cry a little bit xD

The reason she's so upset can be found here.  That, and several other confrontations have left her rather shaken up.}

Sir Metatron's announcement has left quite an impact on all of us, I've noticed. I think it has...ah...'sobered' us up.

I feel awful about it, truly, as when I read his words I couldn't help but feel as if I'd been thinking the same thing all along, and I fought my hardest to not desire to point fingers at any one person. I am as much to blame as the next individual; we are a collective and we must share responsibility. Many of us have made valid points. I suppose now all we must do is coalesce these ideas into something with a solid foundation. ...Hm. It is easier said than done.

When Will was unwell, I tried to communicate with him, but he shut me out. I am rather frustrated at this time over that matter. My only hopes at this time are that he is in better condition. As for Henry - I hope your "talk" went over well and that you are renewed in your happiness.

{Private to Asgard}
Alice has returned from several outings around Asgard. She seems to hold the candle for caution at this point, as after all the kidnappings and attacks, she has remained unaffected by any denizen of Niflheim. This doesn't mean, however, that I do not fear for her safety at times. Being so audacious can eventually catch up with you.
{End Private}

And...has anyone seen Ryuzaki? We were planning to meet together, but it seems he's vanished. I know he has a penchant for wandering off on his own and there are several from Niflheim who would rather he were dead than alive. I'm scared for him.

( Private to Una )

Deichrë ka ive duācghen jho ka lëhsept.
The halo that bends ignites into flesh.

Ha. The demon tongue of my world. How strange is it that I never thought to study this language before. All these months, I have tapped into human translations of demon magick, but to actually go to the source...

I am amazed I even found this book. There are only parts of it I understand, as most of it is archaic prose, but there are spells among them. This line here is a part of our history, but I have only vague ideas as to what it means. It seems to be a book with many layers.

I have also found a Bible. Alice carries one with her and she has mentioned to me many the same beings that others of Earth have told me about - God, the Devil, angels. It is my hope to compare the two books in philosophy and to gain some insight into the religion of Earth. They have told me there are many, but I shouldn't judge.

As for yesterday...I would rather not talk about it. I thank you for your help, Kain, Frank. I hope Lina, who had my body, kept my secrets private. I do not know which is worse - fainting and coughing up blood, or suffering seizures from the split of my Eye yesterday. I have stopped fainting and seizing, though... The cough is persistent, but I've made a remedy.

My eyes! My body is not mine!

Oh, unGods, it burns....

I cannot....oh, I cannot....will not...see.

I am a man - I know that much. But what man this is I do not know! Am I the only one? Someone please say otherwise!


( Prive To Owner Of My Body )

The incident with Henry and Mitch (and Will, I suppose, as well) has left Asgard shaken once more. It makes me sick to my stomach.

When Henry and Will came in, bloody and wounded, it was...I couldn't see the wounds. And I feel blessed for that. It was so much to do.

Eileen was a wonderful help. I would not have been able to treat them properly if she hadn't aided me. I owe her a debt of gratitude that would take lifetimes to repay.

When Mitch came home I feared I would scream out my lungs! How cruel is this? How heartless! How predictable that it should happen to some of the best of us. They sit over there in their Niflheim, hardly making a sound until suddenly one of us is missing and the others are forming a cavalry.

What is it we're doing wrong?

( Private Notes )

These last few weeks have proven difficult and trying for many of us in Asgard. It is no astonishment to find that the recent attacks upon our individuals have only tightened our bonds. With these recent arrivals, I feel the compassion strike in ways it never could before. Henry and Eileen, for example, have bonded immediately due to their relationship in their past life. There is a new man who was walking around today. I have heard his name is Glitch, but I have not had the pleasure of meeting him personally.

On a sour note, those attacks are becoming more frequent. It was Ryuzaki who took the first staggering blow and now Kain seems to be following closely in his footsteps. There has been tension mounting in Dorian and Will. I see it. As for Alessa…I worry. I do not know how to approach her. There are some things that I wish to ask and some ways I wish to comfort her, but she has been fairly distant to me. We spoke once in near depth, but I was left in confusion.

No matter. It appears Will and Henry have made more success with her than I. Should I be so concerned? I never know anymore.

The party is tomorrow. At first I thought it was a mindless move on the part of Asgard to celebrate in a time of crisis. And yet I have found myself mistaken – swayed, even – to the point of nearly looking forward to it. I am not such a social person; therefore I do not intend to stay long. But if it helps in our morale, I support it. There is the matter of Jazz and Shinji at the party. I was at first upset with Mitch and Dorian for their selection, but after some studying of Shinji and some communication with Jazz, I am inclided to say I look forward to meeting them.

( Private To Una )

( Private Thoughts )

I will never go on a walk by myself again.  My experience at Niflheim was not traumatic, but it was certainly a sign of my own ignorance.  That I had allowed myself to be lured by my own curiosity is unacceptable.  What would have happened if I didn't escape fast enough?  At the time, I'd hardly made friends in Asgard.  Would they have noticed my disappearance?

For the last several days, I have spent my mornings in the greenhouse and tending to my herbs.  The afternoons have been spent studying different blends.  Unfortunately, I have no means of knowing if my concoctions work.  I can only hope.  If another member of our house is injured, I will at least have some treatments on hand.  Otherwise, I fear that my blindness causes me to be useless overall.  I will find a way to overcome this.  I must prove myself to these people.

Arachne used to call me worthless all those months before she and our brother left.  She was different than when we were children.  

I am slowly becoming better acquainted with my housemates in Asgard. I have only personally met Alice (as she is my roommate) and Nix, but he is currently nowhere to be found. By the grace of the unGods, I hope he is well wherever he may be. I am left to assume he has gone for a lengthy swim.

The others are a silent fellowship. I thought I was a reserved soul, and now I find that I can hardly tolerate multiple introverts in one house. Will this lack of open communication hinder us in our quests here? There is an abundance of concern in me. What if the others begin to disappear?

Why must everyone disappear?

Fear is a useless emotion.

I believe I shall go for a walk.

I may not be able to see my new room, but it does have this very sentimental scent, as though I've entered it a hundred times before. How delightful to feel this way!

I admit, I am quite nervous about meeting those of Asgard, particularly my roommate, but Metatron has already assured me that all will be well. He has frequently mentioned that we are not here for leisure; that there will be tasks set forth for us that will require pain, struggle, and perhaps a bit of heartbreak. Be that as it may, I have never been without such agonies, and I am confident to say that I am not frightened.

Very slightly, I can sense the others moving about the house as I write this. Metatron has fixed for me a notebook that, how do I say, becomes electronic? It is a journal that all may view, friends and enemies alike. I am quite hesitant to present my thoughts in such an open format, but if it is what must be done... In any case, Metatron has proved himself most kind and considerate. His selections of the members of his household may prove to be the best company I've yet kept.

This is a not only a new home, but a new world. I have a tendency to dwell too much on what has passed. I hope I may overcome this and accept this experience as a new day. Missing those who cared for me before will do nothing to alleviate my transition.

Post - yay!